Friday 7 August 2009

Confusing cousins in kidlit

Having just "read" (skipped through) What Katy Did Next, just after "reading" What Katy Did and What Katy Did at School, I can reveal in a nitpicky style that "Cousin Olivia/ Mrs Page" morphs from being Katy's mamma's cousin:

"Mrs. Page was your dear mother's second cousin; and at one time she lived in your grandfather's family, and was like a sister to mamma and Uncle Charles."

to Dr Carr's cousin:

"But we must treat her politely, you know, Lilly; her father is my cousin."

Susan Coolidge, this is carelessness! And what is it with children's authors that they have such problems keeping up with cousins? Enid Blyton has the same issue - George, Anne, Dick and Julian are all called Kirrin, so we must assume that their fathers are brothers. But then Kirrin Cottage, Kirrin Island etc are said to have belonged to Aunt Fanny's family. Was she also called Kirrin before she got married? I don't think Enid was paying attention.

The other thing that annoys me about the Katy books is that Clover's hair starts out straight but by the time she is 18 it has turned wavy. I wouldn't mind, but they make such a big deal about it being straight:

Clover's thick, straight locks required to be pinched hard before they would give even the least twirl, and to her, Saturday night was one of misery... In consequence of these sufferings Clover hated curls, and when she "made up" stories for the younger children, they always commenced: "The hair of the beautiful princess was as straight as a yard-stick, and she never did it up in papers--never!"

Then in WKDN: Her thick, brown hair waved and coiled gracefully about her head.

I should be deported immediately

I have failed the UK Citizenship test with a score of 50 per cent.

I expect the knock on the door tonight.

Thursday 6 August 2009

No-one wants to see two hot actors making out, apparently - must be why Brokeback Mountain did so badly

I can't help feeling the new Sherlock Holmes film will be dreadful, directed as it is by Guy Ritchie. This makes me sad.

On the other hand, I do like this. And I love this quote from a film critic that Fox News dragged out to put some kind of homophobic angle on it all. "Who is going to want to see Downey Jr. and Law make out? I don't think it would be appealing to women."

How little you know women. Although I could wish Watson was someone other than Jude Law.

Surely now it is just moments before someone dramatises top romance My Dearest Holmes, or even better the fanfic that has the excellent line: "Watson, not only have I been dreaming for years of doing things to you that would shock your conscience, turn your stomach, and outrage your medical sensibilities, I have for the past month been paying a male prostitute to impersonate you while I do them to him."

Wednesday 5 August 2009

Gullbert and Gullian

We have two baby seagulls living on the roof of the house opposite. They peek out every now and then and make a noise like we live by the sea. It's very disconcerting to wake up to the cry of the seagulls when the nearest beach is probably 100 miles away.

Gullbert (or Gullian) is currently going a bit nutsoid flapping his wings and trying to launch himself off the roof, so I shouldn't think they'll be with us much longer.